Living in Alaska has provided the setting for wondrous adventures, all be it safe-calculated adventures. We traveled most of the highways and visited many "wide spots in the road" and of course have seen some amazingly beautiful sights. Getting to see grizzly bears closeup eating and snorting.... heart stopping beautiful scenery of every ilk, getting an idea of how vast, vast can really be....
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| Grizzly bear grazing among the rich autumn colors in Denali National Park |
Truly they have added to my cache of life experiences. As have the negative experiences, in fact I would say here is where I have really learned / reaffirmed some truths about my core being and the inertia of same.
My space, yes a very limited commodity these last 5 months, is very important to me. I like not having to share a fucking bathroom with people whose culture is clearly differently wired w/respect to personal hygiene and hygiene habits. Is this so pathetically American or what? Flushing and wiping clearly are important to me, perhaps too important. I will never choose to live somewhere that I have to share a bathroom as a condition of residence.
I apparently have a limited need for people in my life and this is really an odd one for me. I feel happiest when I'm with people, being active and engaged, yet I seem to also dislike (at time very much) the same... A common thread is that I am suspicious of people and what they want from me. As if I have something of values that they want (and may take )from me. I've always been troubled by this from as far back as I can remember. It can be very limiting in any relationship.
I have a limit of how many times I can do something after which I really struggle to continue. I call it the breakfast cereal syndrome.... I love the breakfast cereal, I eat it every morning, in fact I wake up excited to eat it for breakfast and then one morning half way through a spoonful I can't swallow it, it been too much.... it has now become something that I no longer like and is now just repulsive....
I really have a problem with authority, especially authority that appears to be incompetent. Enough said.
The list is growing longer than I though, I'm just getting started and already I feel quite petty so perhaps it's a good time to end this part and just sum up by saying that I have a need for more control in my life than less.
The positive of this experience has been "the spirit of adventure" that we seem to have developed. I hope it continues as we leave Alaska leading us on new and grander journeys... And that's all I'm going to say for now.
